Iron History

[Previous entry: "12/5/2008: A letter from Charles A. Smith dated March 20, 1988, to Joe"] [Main Index] [Next entry: "12/19/2008: A Letter of April 15, 1988 from Charles A. Smith to Joe Roark, Page 1"]

12/11/2008 Entry: "12/12/2008: Letter from Charles A. Smith to Joe Roark April 12, 1988"

Letter from Charles A. Smith to Joe Roark April 12, 1988

Now see here my fine fellow.

What's all this sending me beer. You know I never touch the bloody stuff. How surprised I am when, arriving home on the 27th March, after spending the day before, and then with Vera and Co., the Reverend suddenly appears at my portals bearing FOUR six packs from various parts of the world- including Kenya. I say, 'Reverend, you really shouldn't,' and he says, 'Well JOE ROARK HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT.'

Anyway, the Reverend dumps the horrible stuff in my ice box and sits from 8:30 PM to way past 11 chin wagging, me looking markedly at my clock and he taking not the slightest bloody notice until I tell him to fuck off, I am tired.

Now it is nice that you remember me on my natal day, but really, likewise PLEASE Joe, not any more. Just so long as you keep in touch and let it be known you are a friend, that's all I ask.

I have had my vast corps of spies and agents provocateur out, scouting the p urlieus of every large city, trying to turn something up about Arnold Schwarz etc etc but with no luck. All seem to have heard of the affair Mikie Mentzer, but no one had heard anything of anyone being after Arnold's arse. Possibly the fact that my spies were all clad in their brilliant scarlet uniforms, to indicate to all and sundry they were secret agents, may have had something to do with it.

Now, my fine young fellow. I have a bone to pick with you.

I am most unhappy with that bit about me in your issue 18 of MS. In fact it was me who came, secretly to St. Jospeh and booby trapped your toilet so it flushed up instead of down. The award you mention was given to me not by the Wanking Wunder for my work on MUSCLE POWER MAGAZINE, but by the IFBB. I was given their highest honor, the DISTINGUISHED SERVICE AWARD FOR MY CONTRIBUTIONS TO SPORTS OVER MY LIFETIME IN SPORTS. NOT, REPEAT NOT FOR BEING EDITOR OF MUSCLE POWER. A correction is requested is requested in your next issue. I know you are a stickler for detail.

Have recently finished a short article for Herb Glossbrenner's mag re Norbert Schemansky. Over one month ago, Bollocks calls me and says for me to do an article on the state of weight training. I tear off a real pot boiler cursing all and sundry in the game for greed, non compassion, competitiveness and the spreading of that nasty taint, Steroids. The arrangement was he'd read it right away and if he liked it pay right away and if he didn't like it then he'd return it right away.

Sandow= nothing new and just a bloody rehash of what dozens have written before. Never have I, for one moment, swallowed that tale of the 446 two hands anyhow. Here's a man with 336 above his head in his right arm, body fully bent down, picking up a 112 pound kettle bell getting it to the shoulders, standing upright. THEN pressing the 112 overhead, BULLSHIT. No one ANYWHERE said how the kettlebell was brought to the shoulders, NO one says where the lift was done, who was present, and if the bar was weighed on approved scales as was supposed to have been done...I'm not buying it.

I watched, until ten PM, the Oscar ceremonies last night. I owndered what would have happened if, after opening the envelope and saying, 'And the winner is--' the announcer put the envelope down and said, 'I ain't bloody well gonna tell you. So there.' Can you imagine the hubbub, the stramash, chivari, hullaballoo etc etc that would have arisen. Someone ought to do it at the next Oscar Ceremony. It would take so much of the stuff shirtedness out of those smug sods sitting there. False smiles on their faces and pretending it didn't matter a damn to them if they won or not.

Enclosed is another year's pay for MS, Power to your press- printing that is,

Best to you and the family,

Chas